absence

The Persistence of Memory. Salvador Dali.

Absence fails the heart fonder,
my days grew colder
a soul searching quest send you yonder,
you absconder
leaving figments of dishonour.

I ponder through sonder
whether it’s a rock you grew under
These memories flee you as you did me
though no blunders can occur through blind
serendipity.

I thought we had similar synergies
connected through endearing entities
but the parental tag proved nothing more than
an accessory.

I ain’t got bitterness you see
not to any degree,
but dangling from the sycamore tree
are your picknies
wading this monstrosity.

Hours by the TV
hoping you’d come for me
sieges on me mentally
these mystic dreams fizzle out eventually,
though it seems these dreams dance upon
a roulette machine,
existentially.

I must forget all your laughs
your flag at
half-mast
as your efforts remain half-assed
your fathering past now in
overdraft
trust me, I wish I knew from the start.

In due time
I’ll heal from disastrous chimes
straddle the fine line of your favourite past times
rugged and prime,
though flesh wounds burn
singed lime
in dirty depths begging reprieve like
Syme.

You exhume skin threatening
to bloom
in a plume of doom infused with
hazy shrooms
it’s safe to assume this mental
implosion
came too soon,
whilst I fume at missed chances to bloom.

As I consume the thoughts I prune
acceptance looms
I’m no longer immune from the gloom
rotting inward I presume
fear whipped by this typhoon
in a grimey Wetherspoons.

Sipping as I fume
my feathers ruffled and strewn
now I’m dizzy drunk
at high-noon,
swimming through sand dunes
hoping for a new moon.

Nah, I said
I’m dizzy drunk
at high-noon,
wishing upon blue
moons.